Thursday, January 9, 2014

sleep and lack there of.


Is it ok that all of my posts in 2014 are about coffee? Yeah, that's just how life is right now. I feel like I could drink coffee all day long, and still want more. The lack of sleep for matt, henry and I sucks. We are reminded of why we don't care for this baby stage, and how eager we are to start sleep training. We are trying to rack our brains as to what exactly we did with Cora because it worked beautifully.

The huge difference is that when Cora was born I had Matt quit his job to help with her. She was so difficult! Soon after her birth I graduated college, took maternity leave and matt was on summer break from school. So we had her first 3 months with both of us at home to support one another. I eventually went back to work and matt went back to school but we had each other. He was such an incredible stay-at-home and school-fulltime dad, we all loved it and I believe Cora thrived with our routines and lower stress levels.

Now, I am on maternity leave but matt works and goes to school fulltime. He isn't around to help me out this time around during the week. Which was inevitable...most people work, but it is more challenging for all of us. Matt also has a ton on his plate- so I feel for him as well. I go back to work in about a week... so things will only get trickier. It is imperative that Henry starts sleeping! Henry doesn't understand for some reason though when I tell him this.

But why does he insist on getting up every 2 hours at night?! Perhaps he is going through a growth spurt? Is it his 2 month shots? He maybe is just that hungry? Maybe he is hot? cold? Maybe he hates the swaddle? Maybe his belly hurts, too much gas? not enough gas? ahhh... being a parent is exhausting! So my "sleep training" google searches have started, I am scouring my stack of baby-sleeping reference books, and reading through my previous posts on cora's spud months of development. There must be a solution. Or maybe he just will grow out of it.

If my sleep deprived memory serves me right,

with Cora:
0-3 months: sleep was struggle, she could not be put down, she fought the swaddle every nap and night, screamed at us at all hours. She slept on our chests or bouncy chair. Matt and I took "shifts"- matt was up through the whole night with her while I slept, and I had her in the morning while he slept.

3-4 months: transitioned to an inclined mattress in her crib, slept maybe a 5 hour stretch? Started a modified babywise/cry it out method

4 months: stopped breastfeeding, started on rice cereal...slept a 7-8 hour stretch at night still swaddled, using cry it out method.

5 months: started sleeping 11-13 hr stretch at night with no swaddle

5 months- 20 months (now): sleeps beautifully about 13 hrs every night. she goes to bed laughing with us and wakes up sweetly talking to her animal friends.

with Henry:
0-2 months: sleep was not such a struggle, swaddled. Nap about 1-2 hours throughout day/night. Able to be put down flat in his bassinet. However cried a lot with gas/belly pains and constantly walking/burping/jiggling.

2 months- 2.5 months (ie. now): stopped breastfeeding, only formula. sleeps for a 3-5 hour stretch, then cries/feeds every 2 hours throughout night.

I guess we need to be patient. It's no wonder that we started thoroughly enjoying Cora when she was 4 months old- no more silent reflux, no breastfeeding, no sleep deprivation, smiling and laughing babe.... surprise, surprise. Things will get easier. Until then, more coffee.

4 comments:

  1. Good heavens you poor thing! That is VERY little sleep! I wish I had a magical method to send you :( I followed Moms on Call and it worked for us but every baby is so different who ever knows right? I will drink a coffee in your honour today!

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    1. Moms on call... I will have to look into that, sounds familiar. Thanks! Are you guys having a second babe soon?.... super fun ;)

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  2. Could it be the formula? Have you tried a sound machine? Does he like a pacifier? Try a swaddle with his arms out. We stopped swaddling once the boys started breaking out of it around 3 months I think. Seems like so long ago... I wish you luck I do know that when I went back to work they were 5 months (3 months adjusted) and only getting up once a night.

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    1. It could be the formula- but I think he is actually sleeping better on it. We have tried a few- which also could stir up his belly switching so much... Ahhh! Pacifier- he doesn't like one, but he has found his fists- thank goodness! Yes, he sleeps with white noise and he is close to having a 1/2 swaddle, but so far his arms wake him up. It will be wonderful once he can suck on his thumb and pacify himself. Thanks for the good ideas! 5 months...that would be nice for matt if I was at home for so long... I am actually kind of looking forward to work. Adult conversation, leaving the house, working is much easier than being a stay at home mom! Night shifts might be a struggle, but I have to sleep during the day to work at night.... sleep! sounds incredibly indulgent.

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